Thursday, September 14, 2006

Settling into this gig

Natalie is 7 weeks old tomorrow and seems to be going on 2 already. She has decided to change her routine over the past few days and although she spends more time being awake, alert, smiling and cooing, she is also spending more time crying inconsolably. I think she is overtired from trying to stay up so she doesn't miss out on anything. I used to do that. When I was in college. Trying to meet boys.

Someone noticed today, as I have before, that Natalie tends to focus her gaze upward, at nothing in particular, smiling in the direction of the ceiling or the sky. He commented that babies her age are said to be able to see angels. That kind of freaked me out because I have had similar thoughts even though I am not a religious person and am not really into the whole angels thing, and also because I wondered if it was his way of acknowledging Julian, which he never had before. It seems that some people in my life are more comfortable acknowledging or referring to Julian now that Natalie has safely arrived, even if it's just to comment on how much she resembles him (she really does).

We have been going out more lately during the day, which seems to keep her a little happier, and makes things easier on me. Just the other day we tried out a Music Together class, which she was totally and surprisingly into, so we signed up for a 10-week class on Monday afternoons. It was really cool to see all the other babies at their various stages of development, and I'm glad I'll still be able to take her once I go back to work part time on October 23. Other things that have made my life easier include the new Enfamil travel packets and the Putumayo Kids Presents: Folk Playground CD, which Natalie and I both love (but I suspect daddy secretly hates).

I have discovered that I am far from the earth mother attachment parent that I thought I'd be after reading the Sears' book and before bringing home a live baby. We're all still making our way with it, but I'm actually a much more relaxed mother than many of my friends apparently expected me to be since I can be pretty neurotic about certain things. And while being cheerful and talking in a high pitched voice doesn't come naturally to me since I have been known to go an entire day without speaking to anyone, the hard work is obviously worth it for the smiles and recognition I am starting to get from the little Miss.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

It sounds like you are all doing wonderfully! Like your friend...I also believe there is much we can't see and don't know.....babies are so pure and open......I think it is wonderful to believe in the possiblity that Natalie and Julian have met each other.....Keep up with all of the fun stuff you and the little Miss are doing...and keep posting photos...She is sooo adorable! I told your Mom I am starting to feeling like a surrogate (or at least virutal) Grandmother :)
Jackie

delphi said...

I know that I have a connection with my siblings that goes a little beyond what I have with other people. Maybe that is the source of Natalie's smiles - a connection with her brother. Maybe not. Since you'll never know what Natalie is smiling at, you can choose to believe whatever is comfortable for you.

And I am glad that you are setting into a routine and lifestyle that works for you and Natalie. Even though we imagine that our parenting styles will be a certain way (much like our marriages), we just can't know how we will react until we are there. I think you should be proud of the balance that you are finding, and to hell with preconcieved ideas!

Love to you all.

lorem ipsum said...

Tears at the mention of Natalie seeing angels. Or someone. Her brother? What's up there beyond the sky?

Have you checked out Springsteen's 'Seeger Sessions: We Shall Overcome' yet? I can't wait to play it for my kids, on whatever kind of technology they're using in the future.

And, happy seven weeks!