The good news is that Natalie is doing amazingly well despite her semi-traumatic journey into the world (her Apgar scores were 8 and 9 if that means anything to you), and I only required a few stitches after the torture me and my hoo-ha were put through. Our favorite cardiologist, Dr. G., happened to walk into the Labor & Delivery room in her street clothes just as Natalie was being born, so she got to meet her and check her out. We'll see her again this week for another echo, but we expect that everything will continue to look normal.
On the home front, we're starting to get the hang of things, which admittedly got off to a rocky start. Natalie hasn't been latching well, and I haven't been producing enough milk because of that, and I suspect also because of all the drugs I was given during my long labor. I had a home visit with an excellent lactation consultant (LC) last week who confirmed that Natalie's hysterical crying was due to the fact that she was hungry and had lost about 10% of her birth weight, that she wasn't sucking properly b/c of tongue positioning, and that I wasn't producing enough. She suggested that I pump and supplement with formula, so that's what we've been doing. Natalie's been back to her lovely pediatrician, Dr. L., a few times, who agreed with what the LC said and has been impressed with her progress in terms of weight gain, development, etc. The original LC said she'd do a complimentary follow-up to work with Natalie on her latch and I have another LC coming tomorrow evening to figure out what's going on with me. Luckily, she's also a physician and accepts my insurance so I only have to pay a $15 co-pay.
Needless to say, feeding has been a hugely emotional issue, which you'll understand if you've been following the breastfeeding debates. On top of that, I feel like I've been having some general PPD symptoms, complicated by complex feelings about Julian's birth and death. Long story short: I love my daughter, I miss my son, and I'm just trying to keep it together.
The good news, as you can see, is that none of this has seemed to faze Miss Natalie...
13 comments:
Good heavens, she is BEAUTIFUL!
If you need an ear, you have my email.
{{{hugs}}}
she's really beautiful.
40 hours labour ( and all that you described) so an ordeal. These photos of Miss Natalie are gorgeous. She's one of the most divine looking little newborn girls I have ever seen (along with my girl N of course). she has the loveliest face and such a calmness about her (I believe you about the hunger crying though). Good luck with the B/feeding. I found it hard but did it for 6 months (pumping, supplementing and B/Feeding). so glad you have L/C to visit and give you support.
She's simply beautiful.
I sent you email with NYC breastfeeding information.
It's exhausting and frustrating to be a "new" mom and a grieving mom plus having to deal with feeding issues too.
(hugs)
-Heather
She is soooooo beautiful! It's a tough road these first couple of weeks, so be aware that it is normal for those !@##! hormones to wreck havoc with you as a parting shot. There were some days where I just stood and watched a sleeping baby and bawled. Still don't know why. But we both survived. Congrats on sticking with the BFing. It's hard at first, but it seems like you are both getting the hang of it. You may end up hating your pump, but it can also be your best friend. If you can continue, or for however long you do, you will not regret it.
Ditto what Heather said. I found that LaLeche League was really helpful to me with my feeding issues (similar to yours).
Your daughter is truly beautiful. Best of luck.
Oh wow! She's so gorgeous. And I'm so very happy that you have such a caring and attentive team on your side, from the delivery crew to the lactation consultant.
You've come out of this so... gracefully. Be proud - you have a beautiful daughter and still sound calm. How do you do it?
Thanks, everyone! And thanks, Lorem. I feel anything but graceful, but thank you.
I think you are amazing! I hope that the LCs can help with your feeding issues. And PPD... it's hard... your OB may have a list of people who specialize in PPD that you could talk to... even if it is just a preventative measure... it may help.
And Natalie is beautiful... as everyone has said.
Oh, she is just SO beautiful.
Your labor sounds horribly traumatic on the heels of everything else you have been through. ((((((hugs)))))))I agree with Sarah et al about PPD...try to get as much support as you can. I found it very hard to keep it together after the birth of my sub and i had an 'easy' pg & labor.
Glad you have the lactation consultants on board. I had a terrible time getting b/f started with my first baby, and it was an emotionally gut-wrenching experience. You just can't be logical or detached when faced with a screaming struggling newborn. The lactation consultant saved our sanity and our b/f relationship. And honestly, even with Chloe establishing b/f was hard (though i was supposedly 'experienced' at that point -- i still had to call LLL a few times!) Sending you lots of good thoughts...
Natalie is absolutely gorgeous!
You've been through so much, no wonder you feel a bit down, but you are aware of your feelings and expressing them which is key.
Keep chugging along with the breast feeding, it isn't always easy, it does take practice for most people. And just when you think you have it down things change!
Enjoy your beautiful kids, as bittersweet as that enjoyment is.
you've got a lovely daughter. it's uplifting to hear your breastfeeding experience - i also have a newborn and she lost 12% of her birth weight because i don't have enough milk. 4 weeks after, i still don't have enough and been supplementing with formula. i feel better knowing that another mom is going thru the rigorous pumping sked as well. stay healthy!
Where did you find it? Interesting read » »
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