Christmas morning

Sylvester and me on Christmas morning, two days after Julian died. Sylvester was very sensitive to me throughout my pregnancy. I think he sensed that something was wrong when we came home without the baby, and rarely left my side.

Goodbye, baby

We got to hold Julian shortly after he passed away. This was the first time I had seen him without his breathing tubes. His nurse, Tammy, dressed him in this outfit and let us spend time alone with him to say goodbye.

He knew we were there

Julian opened his eyes and looked at us a few hours before he passed away.

Our precious little boy

Julian was born at 7:10pm on December 20, 2004. He weighed 6 pounds, 3 ounces, and measured 19 inches long. This photo was taken on our second day with Julian after he was born. The nurses in the NICU at Columbia-Presbyterian's Morgan Stanley Children's Hospital took great care of our little boy.

Footprints

Julian's footprints, taken at the hospital.

A silent moment

Robert and I shopping at Fairway a few days before Julian was born. We had no idea my mom took this photo, which certainly captures the sorrow we were feeling during those last few days we knew we would have with him.

Only one month to go

8 months pregnant with Julian, in our old apartment. I was in desperate need of a haircut and a bigger pair of shoes, but I was happy and couldn't wait to have my baby. I was so innocent then, never having had any pregnancy complications. We were about to attend our last childbirth class with Sheri Bayles when we found out about Julian's heart condition during a routine sonogram at 36 weeks.

Julian's 20 week sonogram

Images from Julian's 20 week sonogram. We were shocked to find out that he was boy, and fell in love with him immediately. We could already tell he would be amazingly handsome!

Julian's 12 week sonogram

Julian's 12 week sonogram. It seemed like no one could make him out but me! Mother's intuition...